Margaret, I Thought the Occasion Called for a Large Gesture

Sequence in Dreamland No. 8

Doubles as a Toaster Oven

Float Like a Butterfly, Sting Like a Bee

The Hotter 'N Hades Self-Rising Piquant Cornbread Mix Full Gospel Hour of Saving Power Is On the Air

Act 2: Big Sister Explains That He Wouldn't Have Been Right for Little Sister Anyway

Act 1: Big Sister Offers to Entertain Him Downstairs While Little Sister Makes Herself Presentable

Updated Version of "All I Want for Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth"

Don't Panic

Norman Rockwell's America Gets Down and Dirty

The Bowlers Carefully Moved Their Human Hosts into Formation

Similar to Baseball Except for the Mortality Rate

You'll Look Sweet upon the Beach in a Bathing Cap Built for Two

Animal, Vegetable, or Mineral?

Ladies Making a Spectacle of Themselves

Similar to Polo Except for the Mortality Rate

Only Now Did It Dawn on Her: She'd Married the Wrong Twin Brother

How "Don't Tread on Me" Became Their Battle Cry

Disanthropomorphism: Humans Pretending They Are Inanimate Objects, e.g., Radioactive Isotopes

Saved by Her Rustproof Corset

But Shouldn't It Be Made of Cloth, Instead of Cotton Candy?

The Woman Who Mistook Her Light for a Hat

And You May Ask Yourself, How Did I Get Here?

Some of Lot's Daughters Chose to Stay

Ye Olde Indian Attacquke, Forsoothe

This Bed Is Equipped with Magic Fingers

But Don't Worry, Boys. We Still Have Her Make the Coffee.

Tattoos Are So Passe! Come in and See the Newest Body Modification Fashions Attempted by Our Experienced and Eager Staff

Our Patrons Buy Our Milk ... Or They Take a Fall

Basket Boys Awaiting Shipment from the Factory

The Handy Dandy Strangled Turkey Delivery Boy

For His "Love Pinch," Alfonso Was about to Enter a World of Pain

What Is Film Noir?

Probed by Science, Nature Yields Up Her Secrets

Then, When He Turns the Knob on the Front Door after Midnight, It Covers Him in Marshmallow Cream.

But Eddie, after This, We Go Dancing, Right? You Promised.

Ha Ha Ha, Ja Ja, You See Zis? ... Zis IS Ze Quick Fuse.

Plums from Heaven Often Become Prunes on Earth

No, See, You Use This Thing Called a "Condominium."

T-Shirt Logo for the Junior Objectivists Pep Band

The Deacons at the Megachurch Form a Tag Team for the Worship and Praise Service

Supersize It

Toss? Keep? What Say Ye?

The Court, acting in loco parentis, establishes a new protocol for obstetric hospitals in order to maximize Choice, founded upon the irrefragable Sweet Mystery of Life.

Dramatic Newsreel Footage of Our Brave Arctic Expedition Battling a Snowstorm

Before the Coin Toss at the Straws vs. Felts Game

Winner by Default in the Nose Billiards Competition

Stay Out of My Way, George, or I'll Give You a New Handicap

Plus Ca Change ...

Achieved Cosmic Consciousness at the Hairdressers

Let's Pop Upstairs and Work Our Cores ... or Corps ... or Corpuses ... or Corpses ... or Whatever